


Dance Like It's the Last Night of the World

by roseclaw



Series: Slayer'verse [1]
Category: Buffy the Vampire Slayer, High School Musical, My Chemical Romance
Genre: Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-11-22
Updated: 2009-11-22
Packaged: 2017-10-03 13:37:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 16,517
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18721
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/roseclaw/pseuds/roseclaw
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bottom line is, even if you see them coming, you're not ready for the big moments. No one asks for their life to change, not really. But it does. So, what are we, helpless? Puppets? Nah. The big moments are gonna come, you can't help that. It's what you do afterwards that count. That's when you find out who you are. ~ Joss Whedon</p>
            </blockquote>





	Dance Like It's the Last Night of the World

**Fandom**: HSM with some BtVS lore mixed in and a drop (a couple drops - okay, more like a splash) of MCR (and PatD, FOB, and CS if you're looking)  
**Pairing**: Ryan/Chad, Troy/Gabriella, Bob/Frank, Chad/Taylor  
**Rating**: R-ish  
**Word Count**: ~16,000 words  
**Spoilers**: None  
**Warnings**: Abuse of the word "totally." This is all shameless crack. I do not apologize. Unless your name is somewhere in this fic.   
**Author's Note**: For . So everything is catered to her... and I'm pretty sure like five other people out there will understand this. Let's pretend the second and third movie never happened. This takes place right after the first movie. Title from _Miss Saigon_ (also one of the prompts - taken literally).   
Cheerleading/support/backstories/random abuse/beta from the super-awesome , who enables me so hard. If this seems like a blatant ripoff of "Welcome to the Hellmouth" - it is.  
**Disclaimer**: HSM is that of Disney and Ortega. Buffy is that of Joss. MCR belong to themselves.  
**Disclaimer 2**: I tried really hard to remove all traces of the passive voice from this, but I don't think I was successful.  
**Summary**: Bottom line is, even if you see them coming, you're not ready for the big moments. No one asks for their life to change, not really. But it does. So, what are we, helpless? Puppets? Nah. The big moments are gonna come, you can't help that. It's what you do afterwards that count. That's when you find out who you are. ~ Joss Whedon

 

Dance Like It's the Last Night of the World: The One Where Chad Second-Guesses Himself Many Times but Never About Ryan

 

Chad only noticed something after the third week. Which was two weeks after Taylor dumped him on his ass. Which was probably why it took him three weeks to notice. And it was one week after there was a huge-ass accident in the wood shop at school and three students needed to be rushed to the hospital. Chad's not sure if the shop accident was related to whatever, but it gave his mind a timeline, so it'd have to do.

Chad noticed that Taylor had dropped like fifteen pounds and then regained it all in muscle. And that kinda of thing in girls was weird. Chad had heard of bulimia and anorexia but neither of those involved the gaining of muscle mass, which was healthy whereas bulimia and anorexia are not healthy at all. There were pamphlets in the guidance office about them.

And Chad would normally talk to Taylor about this stuff, because it was girly - or at least Chad thought it was. So, Troy would have to do, and Chad could schlep through the mocking.

"Dude, have you noticed Taylor recently?" Chad asked during a one-on-one game in the Bolton's backyard.

"Like what?" Troy asked, feigning right and ducking left. Chad knew that move and was able to block Troy's attempt at a layup.

"She's buff, man. Are chicks supposed to be buff? Other than those freaky girls on infomercials."

Troy stopped dribbling the ball and tucked it under his arm. "Buff? Maybe she's joined a gym?"

"Girls don't hide the fact that they've joined gyms. They're really open about that stuff, kinda showing off, you know?" Chad shrugged. Girls were weird, and he really needed a female translator. Too bad he only had Troy.

Troy shrugged and started dribbling the basketball again. And that was the end of that.

\- - -

Chad decided that maybe he should just ask Taylor himself. Of course he didn't know how to ask her. Things had been different when they had dated. Chad could be a lot more open with her but now he couldn't, because she had called it quits, and that was, like, a big social faux pas.

He met her at the coffee shop the next afternoon after school.

They talked for a while about stuff. Nothing really important. Then Chad opened up his less than tactful mouth.

"You look really hot."

Taylor looked at him, stunned.

"I mean, you totally did before, but you're even hotter now," Chad clarified.

Taylor's stunned expression turned into a frown. "We broke up for a reason, Chad. We're not getting back together because you _think_ that you're sweet talking me." Her voice was flat.

There was a reason they broke up? That was news to Chad. "Why _did_ you dump me?"

"I told you, Chad." Taylor was really good at sounding longsuffering. "I just don't have time anymore. I have to keep my grades up if I'm going to apply for Yale in the fall."

Chad frowned. "If you don't have time, why are we here talking?"

"Fifteen minutes isn't going to break me, Chad." Taylor continued to sound longsuffering. "But you know what, I should go." Her voice turned a little sour at the end. She stood up, gathering her purse.

"Tay, wait." Chad stood as well. "You've changed in the past three weeks. I wanted to know if you were okay?" It ended up as a question.

"I'm fine, Chad." Taylor's voice was strained.

"Really? 'Cause you don't sound fine," Chad insisted.

"I'm fine, Chad," Taylor repeated tersely.

Chad let her go. He'd been doing that a lot recently. Okay, so it was twice, and the first time was more metaphorically, but Taylor had still walked away from him.

Chad didn't let her go for long. He kinda followed her, but abandoned that notion when Taylor met up with an older guy. He's, like, really old - maybe in his late twenties. He was kind of pasty, though. With dark hair and dark eyes and a lot of tattoos. He was tiny, maybe even shorter than Chad. And he was also hot. Not that Chad had any - he was hot in an objective sort of way. God, it totally made sense. Taylor was hot, even hotter in the past few weeks. She could totally date college guys.

And that college dude made Chad. He pointed in Chad's direction, and Taylor's gaze followed. She sighed dramatically and beckoned Chad over with dramatic hand gestures. She was too dramatic. Chad didn't think that the situation warranted it. Taylor was dating an older guy. The end.

When Chad was within a reasonable distance, he plastered on a smile and waved. "Hey, Taylor."

Taylor was not amused. "Chad," she said in an exasperated voice. "Why did you follow me?"

"'Cause you didn't tell me why you weren't fine," Chad said with a shrug.

"I am fine, Chad," Taylor repeated, placing her hands on her hips.

"I can see that," Chad said to Older Hot Guy.

"Chad, this is Frank," Taylor said sourly. She was upset with him and wanted him gone. Chad didn't take the hint.

Older Hot Guy or Frank, whatever, smiled indulgently.

"Hey, Frank." Chad held out his hand. Frank shook it. Frank had tattooed knuckles, and he looked a lot more amused than Taylor did. "I can totally see why Taylor would dump me for you."

Taylor's jaw dropped a fraction. Frank looked even more amused. "I like your hair. But didn't your momma teach you that forks and outlets can't be friends?"

Chad couldn't tell if Frank was serious or mocking him. Hot guys mocking him would not be cool. Taylor only rolled her eyes and smacked Frank lightly.

"Frank and I need to go, Chad," Taylor informed him.

"Cool." Chad shrugged. He was totally going to imagine Frank and Taylor together. Because that was hot. "You know, you could have just told me that you wanted to date other people."

Taylor gawked at him. But only a little bit.

"It's okay, Tay. I'll forgive you, but only because he's hot." Chad nodded sagely.

Frank looked like he was going to burst trying to keep his laughter in. He was totally mocking Chad. Whatever. He was hot.

And there was a massive blond guy approaching them. Frank released an admittedly girlish squeal and jumped on the guy's back. The guy looked moderately tolerant of it.

"Is this guy bothering you?" Massive Nordic Guy said to Taylor.

"Oh no, Chad was - "

"I meant Frank," Massive Nordic Guy interrupted.

"No," Taylor said. Chad could tell that she was saying more, and he was actually jealous that this other stranger had Secret Taylor Code and Chad didn't. That just wasn't fair. "Bob, this is Chad. He's my former boyfriend. Chad, Bob."

Bob sized him up, making Chad feel very uncomfortable. Frank slid down Bob's back, accidentally stepping on Bob's left foot. And did he just squeeze Bob's ass? Great, now Chad was going to think about all three of them together. And that was almost like a waste of a fantasy, because Taylor wasn't that type of girl.

"Chad, we need to go now," Massive Nordic Bob said. And Chad was not going to argue.

"Sure. Nice meeting you two," Chad said politely. Because not only did his mother teach him not to stick metal into electrical outlets, but she also taught him manners. Unlike some hot, tattooed guys Chad could mention.

Bob nodded and dragged Frank away by his arm. Taylor followed. Chad swore he heard Frank whisper, "I can't help it if his gaydar's broken." Okay, Frank shouted it over his shoulder at Chad. Same thing.

\- - -

"Dude," Chad whispered fiercely to Troy. He had moments before the homeroom bell rang, and he didn't want to be in trouble with Ms. Darbus more than he already was.

Troy was staring lovingly into Gabriella's eyes from across the room. Not cool. Chad was having a crisis here.

"Dude," Chad said with a bit more volume than necessary.

With much effort, Troy broke eye contact with Gabriella. "What?"

"Dude," Chad said a third time. "Taylor's totally seeing a college guy. He's tiny and covered in tattoos."

Troy stared at him for a moment, and then he burst out laughing.

Chad scowled.

"Man, that's Frank. Taylor's not seeing him."

Chad continued to scowl. "How do _you_ know this when I don't?" he demanded.

Troy shrugged. "Gabriella told me."

Oh. Well. Of course. "What about Bob then?"

"You've met Bob?" Troy raised his eyebrows in surprise.

"Yeah," Chad said challengingly.

"I thought Bob was this imaginary person."

"What?!" Chad exclaimed. "Wait! What?! Why would you - "

Ms. Darbus entered the room with her usual flourish, and Chad wasn't able to complete his sentence, let alone be given an answer. Chad was sure the universe hated him. And he knew that Ms. Darbus hated him.

\- - -

"Chad," Taylor hissed, coming up behind him in the hallway. She pulled him out of the hallway and into the guys' bathroom. Those new muscles gave her a lot of strength.

"The guys' bathroom, Taylor?" Chad asked once he regained him composure and balance.

"Guys don't use the bathroom the same way that girls do," she said breezily. "What were you doing yesterday?!"

"I asked you out for coffee, and then you wouldn't answer my questions." Chad shrugged.

"What if he had been, I don't know, my drug dealer?!" Taylor hissed.

"Drugs are bad, Taylor." Chad frowned. "You're not on drugs, are you?"

"No." Taylor planted her hands on her hips and frowned up at Chad. "I'm not on drugs. Just - you never use your common sense. It's going to get you killed one day."

"That's a little dramatic, don't you think?" Chad mused.

"No, Chad, it's really not," Taylor said cryptically. Well, it sounded cryptic to Chad, mostly because Taylor never really dodged questions and always answered them complete with diagrams, equations, and the occasional powerpoint presentation.

"You're not fine, though. I'm worried about you. Even if you dumped my ass, I still think that you're my friend." Chad knew that was a low blow, but he was totally not above that.

"I am still your friend, Chad. It's not like that at all," Taylor said softly.

"Because it's totally cool. Frank's hot, but he's kind of an asshole," Chad said amiably. "Bob's hot too, in a giant, I-can-crush-you-with-my-fist sort of way."

"Is this a bad time?"

Taylor and Chad turned towards the new voice.

Ryan Evans was standing in the doorway looking a little shocked and a little amused.

"Don't you have, like, your own bathroom?" Chad asked.

"No, but Sharpay does," Ryan said dismissively.

"We'll talk about this later," Taylor said sternly, storming out of the bathroom. She didn't even check to see if the hallway was clear.

"Girl trouble?" Ryan asked, raising an eyebrow.

"She's a girl, and she's giving me trouble, yeah," Chad muttered. "She dumped me for a college guy, who may or may not be her drug dealer."

Ryan raised his other eyebrow. "You do realize that's how rumors start, right?"

"She did dump me for a college guy," Chad argued.

"My condolences," Ryan drawled.

"Why am I talking about this with you?" Chad wondered, then scoffed. "Later." He breezed out of the bathroom. He was totally going to be late for his next class. He'd live, though.

\- - -

Taylor didn't drag Chad into any rooms for the rest of the day. In fact, Chad didn't see her for the rest of the school day.

Troy had abandoned Chad after school in favor of rehearsal and Gabriella, and Chad was bored. He had completed his homework during his free period, not that homework was an acceptable way to spend his afternoon. And it was a Friday. He had a weekend with no homework and no idea what to do with himself.

"Blah," Chad told the ceiling of his bedroom.

Maybe he could go out, just to blow off steam. Maybe he could find a college girl or maybe a college boy just to prove that he could do it too. Okay, maybe not a college boy. They might be hot, but they were still guys, and Chad was secure enough in his masculinity to admit that guys could be hot. But guys also had guys parts. And Chad only wanted to touch his own guy parts, not someone else's. Unless it was the right guy, in which case he'd have to think about it.

Okay, so Chad might be having a quarter life crisis, although he really hoped that his life isn't a quarter over. That would be depressing.

He decided to go out. Because if he was having a quarter life crisis, he was going to have it with other people around him.

And there was only one place that Chad knew of where he could blow off steam and was 16-plus. He should really invest in a fake ID, not so he could drink or anything, just so that he could gain access to the really good clubs. He spent half an hour trying to find an outfit that didn't make him look desperate but also made him look damn hot. He figured that would increase his chances with meeting anyone. And if he chose to pursue something, well, that didn't have anything to do with his clothing choice. He tried very hard not to think about what that meant about his sexuality.

"Hey, Mom!" he shouted as he made his way down the stairs. "I'm going to head out tonight. Don't wait up."

He was almost out the door when his mother caught up with him.

"Chad, what are you wearing?" His mother said after a moment. "Where are you going? And who are you going with?"

"Mom!" Chad whined. "I'm going to Zinc with a bunch of kids from school," Chad lied. Well, he kind of lied. He was going to Zinc, and there would probably be kids from school there.

"Is Troy going with you?" His mother asked.

"No," Chad said shortly.

"I thought you two had made up," his mother mused.

"We did. He's just spending the night out with Gabriella," Chad guessed. Hey, it could be true.

"Alright," his mother conceded, giving him a critical look-over again. "Don't stay out too late."

"Sure thing, Mom." The door was closed behind Chad before he could finish his sentence. He needed to catch the bus, and, with any luck, he wouldn't need to catch it back home.

\- - -

Zinc was the kind of place where you watched your drink carefully. It honestly wasn't _that_ bad, as it was the only club Chad knew of where security constantly weaved through the crowds. It was also the only club that catered to the under 21 crowd, meaning that security had to watch the jailbait from becoming actual jailbait. Plus, they had a five dollar cover charge. Chad had been there once before when a friend of Troy's had been in a band performing at the club. They had been okay, but they weren't worth seeing again. There was too much screaming into a microphone and not enough music.

There was no live band. Instead there was some guy on the stage doing a passable job at DJing. Because, seriously, "Womanizer" into "Keeps Getting Better"? It's like a war of Disney Divas. Maybe if there were a buffer between the two. A male buffer, perhaps. Not Justin Timberlake. Too much old school Disney. Chad gave an involuntary shudder. He wanted to lose himself in the music, not critique it.

Chad surveyed the club. There was a senior from West making heavy duty eye contact with him. She was cute in a cheerleader way, peroxide hair and enough eye makeup to make it look like she dove eyeball-first into a pot of kohl. Except that her eyes were blue, so it really didn't work that well for her. Whatever. She was good enough for the moment.

Chad wandered over to her and asked her if she wanted to dance as "Keeps Getting Better" segued into "London Bridge," and Chad kind of wanted to stab out his ear drums. Was it teenybopper night or something?

He must have physically cringed, because the girl said, "It's okay if you don't." She bit her lip and looked dejected.

Chad was a total sucker for that, so he wrapped an arm around her waist and said, "No, let's dance."

She smiled, showing too much teeth, and she placed her arms on either side of his neck and ran her fingers through the curls at the base of his skull as his hands rested on her hips. Damn, did she have hips, and they moved very well to the music. Which was just as well, because Chad's really didn't, but he didn't let that stop him. He did stop briefly for a moment when "London Bridge" turned into a remix of "Under the Sea."

He stayed with her until the DJ on stage relinquished his turntables to the main DJ for the evening: a guest DJ from New York City. She was very hot, and the first tones to pass through the sound system were mesmerizing. So much so that when the girl Chad was dancing with made a face, stopped dancing, and asked him if he wanted to leave with her, Chad turned her down.

He danced - okay, it wasn't so much as dancing as it was writhing - to her house music for what must have been ages. She was amazing, and he didn't know her name. He really hoped that she had released a CD. And he hoped that the CD had a liberal amount of pictures of her and her cleavage.

After a while, Chad wandered back to the bar for a bottle of water. He asked the bartender if he knew the DJ's name.

"It's Victoria something," the bartender provided.

"Thanks, man." Chad took his water bottle and headed outside for some cooler air. It was like a sauna on the dance floor.

He leaned against a wall and gulped at his water. The night was cool and dry, and the sky was clear. If there weren't so many lights from the city, he could have seen billions of stars. God, Chad loved the desert.

Everything was awesome, except the asshole next to him was blowing cigarette smoke in his direction.

Chad shouldn't have been surprised that it was Frank.

"Hi, Frank," Chad said in an exasperated voice, waving a hand to cut through the smoke.

"Chad," Frank said coolly. Chad was stupidly pleased that Frank remembered his name.

"You remembered my name," Chad _sounded_ stupidly pleased that Frank remembered his name.

Frank gave him a look that told Chad he was stupid in a myriad of creative and insulting ways. Chad's favorite was one that likened him to a water buffalo jumping off a cliff into a muddy river filled with crocodiles. He'd have to use that some time. Troy was always doing stupid things.

Chad cleared his throat. "Is Taylor around?"

"Is your gaydar still broken?" Frank countered. He tried to look innocent. Chad thought he could use more practice.

"My what?" Chad choked out.

"Your gaydar." Frank shrugged. He dropped his cigarette and ground it out beneath his heel.

"So Taylor's not around?" Chad asked, thinking he was being stealthy in his dodge of the question.

"She's around somewhere. Maybe with Bob." Frank shrugged again.

"Bob," Chad repeated stupidly. "Massive Nordic Bob?"

Frank smirked at him. "Later." He ambled inside the club.

Chad sighed and finished up his water. He was about to head back inside when Taylor ran passed him. Like, literally ran passed him. Chad had never seen her run before. It was graceful with long strides. She had something in her hand, but Chad couldn't see it properly as it rushed passed him. It was probably her purse.

He pushed himself off the wall and followed her. He didn't run after her, but he did follow at a quick pace so that he wouldn't lose her.

It turned out that Taylor was chasing the girl Chad had been dancing with. He never caught her name. He never cared to. And Taylor had dumped him, and now she was going all jealous girlfriend on him? To the point of literally chasing the other girl away. That was just weird.

Chad followed them to an alleyway. He stood out on the street. The alley was a dead end, and he didn't want them to know that he had been following him.

Instead of screaming at each other, the girl from West threw a punch at Taylor. Taylor ducked and weaved like a boxer, and then she kicked the other girl in the chest. Like, right in the sternum. And Taylor was pretty short compared to the other girl. Chad had a whole new appreciation for high kicks.

The girls fought, seriously fought, for what must have been five, ten minutes. Chad briefly considered breaking them up, but damn, it was really hot to watch. That thought left him feeling a little unclean.

All fantasies dissolved when Taylor whipped out a sharp stick and stabbed the other girl in the chest.

Chad took a partially aborted step forward, stopped only by the fact that the girl from West exploded in a puff of dust.

Taylor put the stick back in her purse, nodded, brushed herself off, and turned around. The look of shock on her face must have mirrored the one on Chad's own.

After an eternity, Taylor sighed and shook her head, walking out of the alley.

"Chad," she said, fully exasperated and still not having completely caught her breath. Then she focused on something over his shoulder. Chad resisted the urge to look. "Frank," Taylor said in the same tone of voice.

Chad turned around to see Frank shrug and say, "He looks funny when he's in shock."

Chad scowled, realizing that Frank was making faces behind his back.

"And you just killed his date," Frank continued.

"How did she disappear? Is _that_ why you dumped me? Because you joined a fight club?" Chad asked incredulously. "Why didn't you tell me?"

"And break the first rule?" Frank asked. He tried to sound innocent again.

Taylor shot Frank a very dirty look. "No and yes. God, Chad it's almost two in the morning. Can we talk about this some other time?"

"Um, no?" Chad answered.

Taylor growled. "Fine. Zinc closes at two anyway, that way Bob can help deal with this mess. God, Chad," Taylor said again, running a hand through her hair, "you're so stupid sometimes."

\- - -

It turned out that Bob did sound for the club. After the club had cleared out, Taylor made Chad sit at the bar until Frank and Bob met up with them. Taylor refused to say a word until the two guys showed up, and she took to shutting Chad up with new and exciting ways of saying no.

When Frank and Bob arrived, Bob said, "Is this Frank's fault." It wasn't even a question.

"No," Frank said affably, obviously very pleased with himself.

"Are we going to sit around blaming Frank for things, or are you guys going to tell me why Taylor thinks she's the next Bruce Lee?" Chad said with more bravado than he felt. 'Cause Taylor could totally kick his ass. Chad wondered if he would explode into dust if Taylor stabbed him, and he honestly didn't want to find out. Chad mentally chastised himself for his sense of self-preservation kicking in _after_ the fact.

"You really don't give up, do you, kid?" Bob said blandly. It kinda gave Chad the creeps. In a hot sort of way. Had he mentioned that Bob was also hot?

Chad shook his head slowly.

Bob went behind the counter and grabbed a bottle of Jack and a shot glass. He poured himself a drink and downed it. He then leaned over the counter to stare at Chad, making Chad feel even more uncomfortable.

"You obviously have the same amount of self-preservation as Frank," Bob sighed, bowing his head.

"Hey!" Frank objected.

"This is dangerous," Bob warned.

Chad nodded. He'd seen his dance partner explode. That seemed pretty dangerous to him.

"So it's best you hear it from us instead of trying to figure it out yourself," Bob continued.

Chad waited, trying to sit as still as possible on the bar stool. Frank had discovered that the stools swiveled, and he took shameless advantage of that. Chad realized that Bob hadn't said anything �" and that he was waiting for Frank.

Eventually Bob's patience ran out, and he grabbed Frank's forearm to still him. Frank pouted up at Bob as Bob rolled his eyes at Frank.

Chad looked to Taylor, but Taylor rolled her eyes as well.

"Your dance partner was a vampire," Bob said. "Taylor is the Vampire Slayer."

"Vampire," Chad said stupidly. "_The_ Vampire Slayer?"

"Yup," Frank said with a pop. "The - as in the only one."

Taylor rolled her eyes again. "I didn't tell you, so that you could stay safe. I _broke up_ with you so that you could stay safe."

"So now that I know, can we get back together?" Chad asked hopefully. He'd ask if she was nuts later. Because vampires? That was nuts.

"No," Taylor said succinctly.

"Why not?" Chad whined.

"Because you're still staying away from me. You're still going to go on as if you know nothing. You're still going to complain to Troy that I'm seeing an older guy." Taylor gestured to Frank.

"Are you seeing him?" Chad asked.

Frank giggled.

"No," Bob said firmly.

"I'm her Watcher," Frank said through his giggles. "A Watcher trains the Slayer, prepares her for slaying and, you know, preventing apocalypses - apocalypsi?"

"Apocalypses," Taylor corrected.

"So it's just you three against a legion of undead?" Chad asked. "And the Bruce Lee skillage came from _Frank_?" He asked in disbelief.

"And Bob," Taylor said, smiling up at Bob.

"That would explain your muscles," Chad mused. "So. Vampires?"

Taylor nodded.

"And that chick from West was a vampire?" Chad asked incredulously.

Taylor nodded again.

"She didn't have pointy teeth," Chad insisted.

"Vampire teeth descend," Bob said with a shrug. They were all terribly casual about this.

Taylor must have sensed Chad's thoughts, because she pulled the stick back out of her purse. "A stake through the heart turns vampires to dust," she explained.

"If Frank is your Watcher, what about Bob?" Chad asked. It was better than addressing that they were all nuts. Maybe if he found a hole in their story, he could wiggle some truth out of them.

"Bob watches Frank," Taylor said dryly.

"Your Watcher needs to be watched?" Chad asked with a wry laugh.

"Yeah," Taylor said, giving Frank a pointed look.

"And someone to kill spiders for me," Frank piped up.

"He'll kill all sorts of demon spawn but won't go near a spider," Taylor explained.

"There're all sorts of demon spawn?" Chad asked.

"Not just vampires," Taylor said with a nod.

"Huh," Chad said. "And I can't help you?"

"No, Chad. Remember when I said that you never use your common sense and it's going to get you killed some day? I still mean that," Taylor insisted.

"My common sense is telling me that you're all nuts," Chad explained.

"As it should," Taylor said firmly. "But that doesn't mean it's not the truth."

"I want to help," Chad repeated. He also wanted Bruce Lee skills, vampires or not.

"No," Bob said firmly.

Again, Taylor saw through him. "If you want to learn how to fight, I can teach you, but you're not going to help us."

"What about helping me with identifying vampires? Because that chick totally asked me to leave with her. I could have been eaten." Chad was only slightly more successful in acting innocent as Frank was, but the idea of being someone's dinner was not at all appealing.

"If she has big, pointy teeth and wants to move things to a cemetery, she's a vampire," Taylor said, becoming exasperated.

"So vampires are all girls?" That was kinda hot.

Taylor curled her lip in confusion. "No. But the one that wanted to snack on you was. They also like to hang out in clubs. Easier pickings."

"Did you just call me easy?" Chad asked, only mildly offended, because he kinda was easy.

"Yes, so don't come here anymore," Taylor grumbled.

"That's mean," Chad pointed out.

"Yes, and I'm not going to be responsible for when you hurt yourself," Taylor argued. "Because you will hurt yourself. We've been over this."

"Do you hang out here because of the vampires?" Chad asked.

"Yes, Chad," Taylor said after taking a deep, calming breath. "That's why Bob works here, and that's how I spend my free time. And I'm still trying for Yale."

"So you could use help. It'd give you more free time," Chad offered.

"No," Taylor said, followed closely by Bob saying the same. Frank just waved his hand in some gesture Chad wasn't familiar with. It might have been apathy.

"Chad, Taylor has certain… abilities as the Slayer. She can do things that you can't," Bob explained.

"Like a high kick," Chad muttered.

"Like spotting a vampire," Taylor said sharply. "Heightened reflexes and super strength."

Chad perked up, very interested in the super strength.

"No, Chad, I'm not demonstrating the super strength," Taylor sighed. She was really good at reading his mind. Or Chad was just pathetically predictable. "You're predictable," Taylor confirmed.

"How did you know what I was thinking?" Chad wondered.

"You're predictable," Taylor repeated. She then deflated. "Which is why I know you're not going to let this go." She looked to Bob, who looked stoic. He was looking at Frank, who looked like he had shoved a lemon into his mouth. The yellow peel in his hand confirmed this. "But you're going to have to."

"Vampires explode when you stab them," Chad reminded her.

Taylor frowned in confusion. "What?"

"How hard can it be to stab a vampire with a stick?" Chad shrugged.

"You need to exert a lot of force and hit them directly in the heart, and I know that you didn't pay attention in biology class, and I know that you haven't taken physics yet." Taylor's hands found themselves on her hips.

Chad made an "eww, science" face.

"No, you can't help," Taylor repeated again. "But you are able to defend yourself. I can't stop that."

Chad smiled, and Frank made a gagging noise. Bob cuffed him upside the head.

"Any more questions?" Taylor asked.

Chad turned to Bob and asked, "That first DJ? What was with him and Disney?"

\- - -

Chad spent the rest of his weekend confused and researching vampires online. That way, when Taylor cornered him before homeroom Monday morning, he quoted some fact about vampires that may or may not have been true. It turned out not to be true, but it was the thought that caught Taylor off guard.

"Chad," Taylor said through clenched teeth, "what's the first rule of Fight Club?"

"You look tired, Taylor," Chad said innocently. He was becoming really good at the playing innocent thing.

"You know I can see right through your innocent act, right?" Taylor asked. Her eyebrows mirrored that statement.

Damn, foiled. Chad shrugged.

"Just remember that first rule," Taylor growled. "And spend the weekend with Troy watching horror movies if that will get it out of your system."

"Will that get it out of my system?" Chad hadn't realized he had said it out loud until Taylor answered.

"No. Gerard made me watch almost every vampire movie when Frank and I first met. He talked through the entire ordeal, but he pointed out how completely wrong, wrong, wrong each movie was," Taylor said with a smile. Who the hell was Gerard? "But it will keep you from heading out. And to make sure you do it, I'm going to suggest it to Gabriella."

Chad blinked at her. That was really underhanded. And kinda awesome that Taylor was doing something that underhanded. "Are you sure you won't go back out with me? Because this evil streak that you've started? I really like it. Like, a lot."

Taylor rolled her eyes. "No."

\- - -

Gabriella was excited about Taylor's idea. She wouldn't stop talking about it all week. By the weekend, Chad thought he would have tried anything to beg off - if he knew Taylor wouldn't hunt him down and put a high kick to _his_ chest. Chad had been surprised that Taylor had originally said she planned on going. Gabriella spent the first ten minutes apologizing on Taylor's behalf, explaining that Taylor just had so much work with upcoming AP exams and everything. It didn't matter that AP exams were a month away.

Chad totally would have bought it too - if he hadn't known exactly what Taylor was doing at the moment. And, okay, Chad could admit that his imagination might have embellished the entire ordeal a bit with Taylor dancing sandwiched between Frank and Bob.

"Hey, Troy?" Chad asked. He hoped he had made it through Troy's haze of "Gabriella at a close distance." "You never explained why you thought Bob was imaginary."

"Oh," Troy said distantly. He was watching Gabriella's nose.

Gabriella answered for him. "The way Taylor described him it seemed that Bob was this unseen force that kept Frank out of trouble."

"Who is Frank, anyway?" Chad could totally pull off the innocent act with Gabriella.

"Some guy she met at the library. He's helping her study up on things for school," Gabriella said in a tone that told Chad that he should be doing the same. "He's adorable. Like a pocket study-buddy." She snuggled closer to Troy on the couch.

Chad never thought he would ever have heard Gabriella say _that_."You've met him?"

"Yeah. I ran into her at the library." Well, of course she did. "Now shh, the movie's starting."

\- - -

Chad's phone rang right as the lead vampire hunter stabbed the head vampire in his coffin.

Chad ignored it.

His phone rang two minutes later. He sighed. Troy threw popcorn at him and told him to answer it.

Chad sighed again, but he grabbed his phone and headed into the Bolton's kitchen.

The display told him that Taylor was calling him.

"I'm at Troy's. We're watching movies. There's no need to check up on me," Chad answered sullenly.

Nothing but silence greeted him.

"Taylor?" he asked worriedly. "Do you need help?"

"Sorry," she said eventually. "Yes, actually, I do need your help."

"Seriously?" Chad blurted. "Because I wasn't serious. You're serious?"

"Yes, Chad."

"What about Bob or Frank?" Chad asked, thoroughly confused.

"It's not that kind of help," Taylor said, and Chad was completely lost. And even more worried.

"Where are you?" he demanded.

"Zinc," Taylor said tersely.

"Meet me outside," Chad told her. "I'll be there in fifteen minutes."

\- - -

Chad was there ten minutes later. Taylor was outside leaning against a wall, chewing on a fingernail.

"Chad, thank God," Taylor murmured, throwing her arms around him.

"You okay, Tay?" Chad had to ask.

"Better, now that you're here." Her voice was soft, and Chad's chest filled with an emotion he couldn't name - but it was a heady one. He was immediately suspicious.

"What do you need?" he asked as politely as he could, but he knew that Taylor had figured out that he knew she was manipulating him. She was becoming really good at the underhanded thing.

"One of your friends is in there dancing with a vampire," she whispered into his ear, tightening her hold on him.

"All my friends know you, so why didn't you do something about it?" Chad asked more confused than annoyed. Just by a bit, though.

"The situation is a little more delicate than that," she stated carefully.

"Taylor, who is it?" Chad demanded.

"Ryan Evans," she said softly.

"And you thought _I_ could do something about _that_? Why?!" Chad said shrilly. Ryan Evans meant that the vampire was definitely not a girl. And he wasn't exactly friends with Chad either.

"Yes, I think you can help," Taylor said firmly.

Chad grumbled something that may have caused Taylor to roll her eyes. "Fine," he relented. "What do you want me to do?"

"I want you to - " Taylor was interrupted by her phone chirping. Chad leaned over her to see what text message she had been sent. It read _hs levin. bck dr_. "Damn," Taylor hissed. "Chad, come with me."

She didn't give him room to answer; she just grabbed him by the wrist and tugged him to the other side of the club. She practically threw him up against the wall and ordered him to play along. And Chad couldn't respond because Taylor shoved her tongue down his throat. It's not that Chad minded the sudden tongue-attack �" it was just unexpected. And it was acting. That part only disappointed him slightly, because hey! Making out was awesome!

Chad brought his arms around her waist, resting his fingertips in the small of her back when he heard footsteps - just in time for her to pull away. She wasn't focused on him anymore, which was sad, but they were supposed to be saving Ryan from becoming dinner. Chad guessed that took priority.

"Ryan!" Taylor feigned surprise. "What are you doing here?"

Ryan looked like he was about to die from the embarrassment of being caught off-guard behind a club that was not exactly well lit. The other guy, however, looked like it was his birthday, Christmas, and other gift-giving holidays all wrapped into one.

Chad never would have guessed that he was a vampire. Seriously. He looked like he hadn't seen the sun in years, but Ryan's skin looked exactly the same. The vampire looked _normal_ with normal but a bit punkish clothing and black dyed hair and was that eyeliner? Well, the eyeliner would have been normal on a punk kid, so Chad guessed it was normal.

"Oh, this is just too good," Punk Vampire said.

Ryan gave him a confused look. Taylor put her bitchface on. Chad was confused. He didn't even know that Taylor had a bitchface. It was intense but not really hot.

"The Slayer," Punk Vampire grinned. His teeth looked normal enough. And then instantly they weren't normal, and his face was all contorted and hideous. "What a treat!"

Chad wondered how many people knew that Taylor was the Slayer or if vampires didn't count. Was it some smell or something? That only vampires could smell? Well, if vampires could smell it, maybe dogs could too. But that didn't matter.

"You will die by my hands," Punk Vampire said with a bit too much glee than strictly necessary, not that Chad knew what amount of glee would be necessary for a death threat.

Ryan looked even more confused.

Taylor and Punk Vampire were in the middle of a freaky staring contest, so Chad took matters into his own hands.

"Dude," he said to Ryan. "You might want to come over here. Like right now."

Ryan frowned but obeyed. He stood next to Chad, and Chad instinctively took a step in front of him.

"What's going on?" Ryan whispered, peering over Chad's shoulder. "I thought you and Taylor weren't dating anymore."

"_That's_ what you ask about?" Chad asked, astonished. He would have asked about what a Slayer was or why Punk Vampire looked like, well, a punk vampire.

Taylor responded to Punk Vampire by saying something along the lines of dying was horrible and clichéd and the vampire should have tried harder. And then, BAM! Taylor got her Bruce Lee on.

Ryan made a squeaky noise behind Chad. Chad nodded in agreement.

Punk Vampire didn't last very long and met his end in an explosion of dust that liberally coated Taylor's shoes.

She smiled brilliantly at the two boys. "I love how they always say such corny things," she admitted. "It makes staking them feel much more justified."

"My hookup just exploded over your Doc Martins," Ryan said, dazed.

"Sorry, honey," Taylor said honestly. Chad noticed that Frank was standing in the threshold of the door Ryan and Now Nonexistent Vampire had gone through.

"Fuck," Frank said, startling Ryan. Ryan looked so lost that Chad was about to take pity in him, but Frank continued talking. "Taylor we talked about other people finding out about this. Damn it, I need Bob." He fished out his cell phone from its hiding place on Frank's person and texted something furiously while saying, "You three stay right there."

"Who are you?" Ryan asked in an uppity tone that Chad thought only Sharpay used.

"Stay right there," Frank said, pointing a finger at Ryan without looking up from his phone.

Frank and Taylor appeared to be having a silent conversation that involved a lot of yelling. Chad felt uneasy. Ryan kept trying to ask questions, and Frank always cut him off.

Bob sort of materialized in the doorway behind Frank after what felt like hours. He didn't look happy. He was then dragged into the silent screaming match Taylor and Frank were having with their eyes. Bob seemed to be on Frank's side, but it was difficult to tell, as the entire thing was silent.

Bob broke the silence. "The four of you are coming with me." Without looking for them to acknowledge the order, he headed back into the club.

Ryan looked like he was about to protest but Chad tugged on Ryan's arm, dragging him after Bob. Taylor and Frank followed but continued to have their argument - out loud this time. Chad tuned it out. He let Ryan go only when he knew that he wasn't going to bolt.

Bob lead them to what must have been a dressing room and made them all sit down on a couch that looked like it couldn't support Chad's weight let alone three teenagers. Frank tried to sit on Bob's shoulders, but Bob kept shoving him off. Frank eventually ended up perched on the arm of the couch.

"Taylor," Bob started. He didn't finish; he just shook his head.

"I called Chad to help with Ryan. That's it," Taylor said firmly. "I thought that Chad would be less intrusive than I on distracting Ryan from that vampire. Ryan just left too early."

"I'm sorry," Ryan said, looking stricken. "Did you just say 'vampire'?"

"People don't explode when you stab them in the heart," Chad pointed out helpfully.

"_You_ knew this?!" Ryan shrieked at Chad.

Chad shrugged nonchalantly. He felt kind of awesome that he did know, though.

"You endangered him," Bob accused.

"It wasn't supposed to go that quickly. I thought Ryan would need a lot more sweet talk before leaving with some stranger," Taylor grumbled.

"Hey!" Ryan objected.

"Not the point," Bob rumbled.

"Bob's right," Frank said. "This isn't about how easy your friend is. This is about how you've endangered two of your friends."

Bob shot Frank a look that distinctively told him to stop helping. Frank waved it off.

"My hookup was a vampire?" Ryan said slowly, trying out the words. "Is this a joke? Am I being Punk'd? Ashton would make everything better."

"No," Chad scoffed. "You're not being Punk'd. God, Ryan. There're explode-y vampires and you think you have a chance to meet Ashton."

"Too many people know about this, Taylor," Bob said through the conversation.

"Would you have preferred that I let that vamp munch on my friend?" Taylor shot back.

"No, I wouldn't have," Bob said. He sounded like he was becoming angry. "How do you intend to help them now?"

Taylor blushed. "I'm not sure," she mumbled.

"You should have thought of that earlier. It's too late now, so how do you intend to keep them safe?" Bob reasoned. It was actually sound logic. Chad was sure that's why Frank wanted Bob to handle it.

"We're going to teach them how to defend themselves," Taylor said.

"No, we're not," Frank said quickly.

"Yes, we are," Taylor countered firmly.

Bob sighed and stared intensely at Ryan and Chad.

It made Chad uneasy, and he could tell that Ryan wasn't doing much better. He vaguely wondered how Bob had mastered that look, and then he remembered that he had met Frank.

"How do _we_ plan on doing this?" Bob said, cutting off something Frank was about to say. It probably wasn't productive anyway.

"The same way you guys taught me," Taylor explained.

"Really?" Bob looked unimpressed.

"Or would you rather they end up on the wrong end of some vampire's fangs?" Taylor countered. Damn, she was _really_ good that this underhanded stuff.

Bob folded. "Fine."

"Seriously?" Frank and Chad asked at the same time.

"Would someone _please_ explain to me what is going on?" Ryan demanded.

"Not it," Frank said.

Bob glared at him.

"Your hookup was a vampire, Ryan," Taylor explained. "I'm the Vampire Slayer."

Ryan gave her a wry look.

"No, really," Chad said.

"How does Chad know?" Ryan demanded snidely. "Did you kill his hookup too?"

"Yeah," Taylor said contritely.

"Oh." Ryan deflated. "So? Vampires?"

"Vampires," Taylor confirmed.

"This is so heartwarming, kids," Frank said tearfully. Well, mockingly.

"My break's over," Bob announced. "Are you good on your own?"

"I think we're fine," Taylor said.

"I think _you're_ fine, Bob," Frank said. "Damn fine." He then attempted to jump on Bob's back. He only succeeded in being dumped on the floor. He scrambled out of the room after Bob.

Chad felt as if he had missed something important.

Taylor and Ryan looked as if they were in on whatever it was that Chad was missing, and that wasn't fair.

"Wait? What'd I miss?" Chad asked, because it wasn't fair that he didn't know.

Taylor gave Chad a very scrutinizing look.

Ryan just shook his head and said, "He had no difficulty accepting vampires but can't figure out Bob and… that other guy?"

"His name is Frank," Taylor said.

"That's Frank? The Frank that Chad thinks is your older college boyfriend?" Ryan laughed. And didn't stop.

Chad rolled his eyes. "What?" he demanded acidly.

"Bob and Frank are dating," Taylor said, eyeing Ryan with concern.

"What? No, they're not!" Chad insisted.

"Oh, trust me, they are," Taylor said, sounding as if she had been horribly scarred. "And Frank is definitely right about your gaydar being broken." She laughed a little too.

"Bob and Frank are dating," Chad parroted. "Really?"

Taylor said, "Yes." And then decided that it was time to move on. "Ryan, are you okay with the vampire thing?"

Ryan reigned in his laughter enough to say, "No."

"Do you want to help Chad and me? And train with Frank and Bob?" Taylor proposed.

"We're gonna be like Bruce Lee!" Chad punched the air.

Ryan shrugged. "I don't want to leave with a vampire again. Are you sure that was a vampire?"

"Have you ever seen a person explode when stabbed?" Chad asked dryly.

"I've never seen a person stabbed," Ryan snapped back.

"You've seen movies, dude!" Chad said, using grand hand gestures.

"Not the same," Taylor said. How did Taylor know this? Chad opened up his mouth to ask, but Taylor continued, "And not the point."

"What would I be doing?" Ryan asked, skeptical of the entire situation.

"For the moment you'll learn how not to leave a club with a vampire and basic self-defense. And then if you're okay with that, we can move on to other, more complicated things - like research," Taylor explained. "I do all the heavy lifting. How does that sound?"

Ryan looked to Chad.

"You just can't tell anyone about what you're doing," Taylor pointed out. "This includes your sister."

Ryan bit his lip. "I'll do it, but I don't know how long I could keep a secret from Shar."

Apparently Taylor thought that was good enough, because she said, "Meet me tomorrow at Bob and Frank's apartment. They can explain the role of the Slayer and her Watcher then, because I think they're distracted for the rest of the night." Taylor looked thoughtful for a moment. "I should go back on patrol."

"Are you a beat cop now?" Chad asked, smirking. "A supernatural beat cop?"

Taylor gave him an unimpressed look. "Sure. You can call it that - but only this once. I want you to make sure Ryan makes it home okay," she ordered.

Chad's face was wiped blank. "Why?"

"Because you've seen a vampire at least twice. You know what to look for," Taylor reasoned.

"No, I really don't," Chad responded. "And I'm sure Ryan drove here and I know I had to take the bus, so how am I going to go home after making sure Ryan makes it home okay?"

"So stay the night," Taylor said, as if it weren't that big a deal. Maybe to her it wasn't, but Chad was not going to willingly stay under the same roof as Sharpay.

"But!" Chad protested. He really didn't know what to say other than that and that he really, really, really didn't want to stay at the Evans's house - mansion, whatever.

"You can stay over, Chad," Ryan said quietly. "I'll keep Shar from killing you in your sleep."

"That's so kind of you," Chad said in a deadpan.

"Just do it, Chad," Taylor said, standing to face them and placing her hands on her hips. She looked as if she would totally kick Chad in the chest if he disagreed.

"Fine," he sighed.

\- - -

Chad and Ryan didn't run into any vampires on the way to Ryan's car, which Chad counted as a bonus. He didn't want to be staying over at the Evans' house _and_ have to fight a legion of (or one) vampires that he didn't know how to fight and didn't have a stake to kill with.

Chad slept in the guest room in Ryan's suite and woke up to shrill yelling. Sharpay had a very loud voice that carried very well.

"Why would you do such a thing?" she demanded. "It's not like you two hooked up, because he's in your guest room!"

Ryan said something calmly, too low for Chad to hear it. He did hear Sharpay's response.

"Oh, well that makes it okay then! God, Ryan!" A door slammed.

Chad wandered down to where he thought the noise had come from and found Ryan sitting at a table, bent over a mug of coffee.

"Hey," Chad said quietly. "Sorry if I made Sharpay angry with you." He sat across the table from Ryan.

Ryan looked up. "I don't like lying to my sister," he said solemnly.

Chad's mouth twitched, and he had no idea how to answer. "This is all new to me, too."

"Oh. My. God!" Chad looked up to see Sharpay in the doorway to the kitchen, hands on her hips, and she glared at him. "You _did_ hookup with my brother! You - you - ugh!"

Chad blinked in confusion. "…What?"

Sharpay scoffed at him. She stormed off again.

"What did I miss this time?" Chad asked Ryan. "Why would she think we would hook up?"

Ryan shook his head and refused to answer any questions about subject.

\- - -

The next afternoon Chad and Ryan found themselves in front of a duplex apartment on the outskirts of town. Chad knocked, and Taylor let them in.

"You both came!" she exclaimed as if she really didn't expect them to show. She obviously expected Chad but not Ryan. "Uh, Bob and Frank are warming up downstairs."

Chad looked down the stairs and heard a crash followed by, "Ow! Bob, you fucker!"

This was followed by another crash and, "Rot in hell, bitch!"

Taylor winced. "Sorry about that. Frank gets kinda… into things. Now would be a good time to head downstairs. Frank's probably done for the day, so it's my turn with Bob. You can watch and see what we're expecting of you guys. Well, it's not what we're expecting. We are expecting you to defend yourself - not attack."

Frank stomped up the stairs, grunted at the teenagers by the front down, and went up the stairs into a living area and kitchen. He made a lot of noise in the kitchen, too.

"Come downstairs," Taylor said, leading them downstairs.

Bob was leaning against a wall. He was also naked from the waist up. Chad totally understood why Frank always wanted to climb him like a tree, because, damn! Bob toweled the sweat off his neck and gave the teenagers an appraising look.

"Who's going first?" Bob said finally.

Taylor made a face at him that Chad knew from experience meant that they had been over this before and she wasn't going to repeat herself again.

"Alright," Bob agreed.

Taylor peeled off her shirt. Chad was definitely not prepared for that. Unfortunately, she was wearing some weird sports bra that covered more than a regular sports bra. That was just not fair.

Taylor gave Bob a tiny nod. Bob launched himself from the wall at Taylor. Then everything was a fury of kicks, punches, blocks, and crazy spins. There was no way that Chad would be able to do that. Everything came to an end when Bob tugged at Taylor's wrist, pulling her off balance and had pulled a stake out of nowhere (well, Chad figured it logically must have been his pants) and aimed it at Taylor's heart.

"Cheater," Taylor muttered, panting.

"Because vamps never cheat," Bob snorted. He sounded equally as out of breath.

"Who's going first?" Taylor asked, smiling at Chad and Ryan. Chad knew that he looked shell-shocked.

Ryan shrugged and said, "I'll do it."

Chad gaped at him.

"Do you want to go up against me or Bob?" Taylor asked as Ryan completed a few stretches he must have picked up dancing.

"Bob," Ryan said decisively. "I doubt many vampires are your height, Taylor."

"Fair enough," Bob said with a shrug. "Let me know when you're ready. I need to check on Frank." Louder Bob said, "If you touch my kit again, I'm going to eviscerate you, you sneaky fucker!"

Chad heard maniacal giggling floating down the stairs. Followed by another crash, and Bob bellowed something that lost all meaning as he thundered up the stairs.

Chad looked to Taylor to see if this should make sense to him. She was stretching on the floor. It was a really strange stretch that demonstrated exactly how flexible she was.

"You're drooling," Ryan whispered into his ear.

Chad instinctively wiped his mouth and found no drool. "No, I'm not!"

Taylor looked up at the two of them. "Was this a bad idea?" she asked them with a glare.

"Yes," Bob said as he descended the stairs, pulling Frank along behind him. "This is. You ready, Ryan?"

Ryan nodded.

Frank perched on the bottom step, smiling up at Bob.

Bob gave Ryan a small tell before launching himself at him. Ryan ducked out of the way, weaving underneath Bob's punch and ending up behind him. Bob spun, lowering his center of gravity and kicking a leg out to trip Ryan. Ryan jumped over it, ducking again when Bob's fist followed. This continued on for a long time. Frank sat on the edge of the stair, leaning precariously. Chad expected him to fall over any moment. Taylor frowned her think-y frown. Pensive frown, whatever. Chad then had the irreversible thought that Ryan looked just as hot as Bob. Sweat was forming at the base of Ryan's skull as he continued to avoid contact with Bob. At one point, Ryan did a one-handed cartwheel to avoid Bob's sweeping kick. There were two very hot men fighting in the middle of a basement. It was very Fight Club and very - it was better than porn.

Frank must have followed Chad's thought process, because he was leering up at Chad. "Your boy's pretty hot," he said with a wink.

Chad was flustered and couldn't come up with an answer. Luckily he didn't have to. Ryan ducked a moment too slowly and was knocked to the ground by Bob's fist.

Ryan looked up at Bob, stunned.

"Not bad, kid," Bob said, offering a hand up.

Ryan accepted it. "Fighting is like dancing," he said nonchalantly.

"Dude," Chad said intelligently.

Taylor smiled broadly.

"I call Fluffy!" Frank shouted, shooting to his feet.

"You'd better stretch, kid," Bob told Chad.

Chad nodded.

"And be careful," Bob added, leaning into Chad's space. "He's a sneaky fucker."

Chad did a few stretches that Taylor instructed him to do and found himself in the center of the basement looking down slightly at Frank, who grinned up at him.

Frank started out with the same sweeping kick Bob did, so Chad was prepared for it. Frank spun around behind Chad, and did he just grab Chad's ass?

Yeah, that was a grope.

Frank took a swing at Chad's face, which Chad ducked. Frank telegraphed his punches outrageously. He ended up in Chad's space, and pecked a quick kiss on Chad's lips.

In the long moment it took Chad to process that Frank kissed him, Frank knocked Chad's feet out from under him. Chad landed on his back, and Frank sat down on his chest.

"I win!" Frank announced gleefully.

Chad looked to Taylor for help. She only shrugged.

"Told you he was a sneaky fucker," Bob said casually.

Ryan gave Chad a superior look.

That could have gone a lot better.

Frank leaned into Chad's face, and Chad thought that Frank was going to kiss him again. Instead Frank said, "Is that for me? Because of my mad fighting skills?" Frank didn't say what he was talking about. He and Chad both knew that Chad was half hard.

Chad flushed a deep purple, and Frank bounded off cackling. Then attempted to tackle Bob, who stood there, absorbing Frank's inertia. He might have ruffled Frank's hair, or Chad's mind might have been playing tricks on him.

Chad didn't stand until he willed himself to soften. When he did finally stand, Bob stepped up to him and offered to teach him some basic dodges and blocks, and by the end of the afternoon, Chad needed an ice pack and ibuprofen. Maybe the Bruce Lee thing was more difficult than he thought it would be.

Taylor sat in a corner of Frank and Bob's kitchen with them as Chad and Ryan sat on the couch in the adjoining living room not talking to each other. Taylor spoke softly, and Chad didn't like her body language. It was stiff and impassive. Bob and Frank looked the same. Chad read the body language as "not good."

Ryan gave Chad a look that read the same.

It was almost seven at night, and Taylor, Bob, and Frank all looked very serious.

Chad should have headed home an hour ago.

Taylor gave Ryan and Chad a look that Chad was not able to translate. Bob and Frank, though, had the translation, which was not fair.

Chad was about to demand to know what was going on when his phone rang: Troy. He rolled his eyes and answered, "Hey, man, what's up?"

"Are you okay?" Troy asked, sounding mildly flustered.

"Yeah, I'm fine." Chad frowned at his phone.

"You left in a hurry last night, saying Taylor needed your help," Troy pointed out. "Everything worked out?"

"Yeah. Was there a reason it shouldn't?" Chad asked. He was irritated at Troy's questions, but Chad reminded himself that Troy was just a concerned friend.

"Because you've been missing for like almost twenty-four hours," Troy explained.

"Oh, I helped out Taylor and then ended up at the Evans's place," Chad said. He didn't meet Ryan's eyes, favoring the cuffs of his jeans. He picked at them a bit with his forefinger. "My parents know what's going on."

"Where are you now?" Troy asked.

"Why?" Chad shot back. He had no idea how to explain where he was. Other than the obvious, but he didn't want to explain why.

"Because I'm worried," Troy said. Chad heard Gabriella's voice in the background tinnily explaining that she was concerned too.

"I'm with Taylor and Ryan. We're fine." Chad didn't wait for Troy to respond, he just hung up.

Ryan peered at him curiously. Chad rolled his eyes.

"Troy was being a dick," Chad explained.

"He was concerned about you," Ryan corrected. "He didn't sound remotely dick-like to me."

"Whatever. I should head home," Chad said moodily.

"No, you're not," Bob said commandingly.

Chad looked stricken. "Why?"

"We're not done here." Bob narrowed his eyes. Chad took the hint.

Ryan looked curious.

"I'm going to throw a pizza in the oven, and you two are going to help us," Bob instructed. "This is what you said you wanted," Bob reminded them.

Chad nodded and didn't sigh dramatically. He counted that as progress: not receiving another beat down from Bob.

Behind Bob, Chad could see Frank wielding a large knife over a cardboard box. The knife was larger than necessary for opening up a frozen pizza. It was only then that Chad started in on his second thoughts that maybe, just maybe, this was not a good idea.

"You two," Bob addressed both Ryan and Chad, "sit down at the table." Bob turned around. "You too, Iero. Taylor, you're with me."

Chad watched forlornly as Taylor and Bob disappear upstairs after Taylor put the pizza into the oven and set the timer.

Frank sat across from Chad and kept grinning at him with a large Cheshire Cat grin that made Chad ridiculously uneasy. More so than Bob's serious tone.

Chad shifted carefully on his chair. Frank continued to smile at him.

"What are we helping with?" Ryan asked softly, make steady eye contact with Frank.

Frank lit up with excitement, dropping his evil smirk for a real smile. "We're going to prevent the end of the world!"

Ryan and Chad gave him a highly skeptical look.

"And the gates of hell are at our front step?" Chad asked in a deadpan.

Frank rolled his eyes. "Don't be fucking stupid, Fluffy. The nearest hellmouth is in Arizona. I'm talking about a vampire uprising."

"A what?" Chad choked out.

"Vampires. Rising up. Taking control. Making us dead." Frank paused and then frowned. "Or undead. The usual."

"The usual?" Ryan asked.

Frank shrugged. "This sort of thing happens a lot. They ruled the earth once, now they want it back, et cetera, et cetera."

Chad almost asked for clarification of "a lot" but thought better of it.

Taylor and Bob descended the stairs, arms full of books. On top of Bob's pile was a laptop. Chad looked stricken.

The books were dumped on the couch right as the timer buzzed. Taylor pulled out the pizza, and Bob pulled out some plates from a cabinet.

"Help yourself," Bob announced.

"Pizza and… studying?" Chad asked, eyeing the books on the couch.

"Research, Chad," Taylor said. "There is no way that you're going out without more training. This is how you can help, and I know that you'll be safe."

Chad didn't protest, because he knew that he sucked at the fighting thing, and he had pestered Taylor into letting him help. It was his own fault. He grabbed a slice of pizza and shoved it into his mouth, muttering a "Thanks" to Bob. Then a moment later, Chad hissed and dropped the slice back onto his plate. "Hot!"

Ryan rolled his eyes. "It just came out of the oven. What did you expect?" He had taken a slice and hadn't touched it.

"What will we be researching?" Chad asked. It sounded clumsy around his burnt tongue.

"Something that may be called "Camisado,"" Taylor said.

"Isn't that a military technique?" Chad asked, poking at his pizza to check its temperature.

"Yes," Taylor said, her voice colored with surprise. What? Chad wasn't a retard. Most of the time. It's just sometimes he chose not to pay attention to things. "It's a surprise attack at night."

"Well, if it's a surprise, how do you know about it?" Chad wondered.

Frank sniggered.

Taylor rolled her eyes. "I was tipped off that the Camisado was coming. Well, not tipped off as much as a vamp threatened me with it. Vamps're really cocky when I fight them. It's weird."

"We're researching what exactly a vampire camisado entails," Bob said. "Grab a book and look for any clues. And if any of you - I'm talking to you, Frank - If anyone gets pizza grease on my books…" He let the threat go unspoken. Chad figured that it was something suitably unpleasant.

\- - -

"I'm so bored!" Frank lamented. He had buried himself in Bob's side occasionally pointing out sentences in the book on Bob's lap and occasionally poking Bob in the kidney. Bob tolerated both for the most part, and he tended to swat Frank's hand away anytime it was in motion.

Chad and Ryan had a book between them on the floor, and Taylor was on the other end of the couch. They only had a handful of cryptic sentences about a demon camisado and nothing about a vampire camisado, unless the two were the same thing.

"Then call Patrick," Bob offered, not taking his eyes off his book. "Or go to bed."

Frank pouted.

"Don't say it," Bob muttered.

"How do you know what I'm about to say?" Frank teased.

Bob grunted and went back to reading.

"I'm going to go on patrol," Frank said, unwrapping himself from Bob.

Taylor's head shot up from her book.

Bob sighed and closed his own book. "You're not going alone. We'll call it a night."

Frank smiled up at Bob, and Chad was surprised that Frank didn't jump on Bob in some way.

Taylor nodded. "I'll meet you after I drop Chad and Ryan off at their houses."

Ryan's nose scrunched up in distaste.

"You two are _not_ joining us," Taylor said firmly.

"I wasn't planning on it," Ryan answered smoothly.

Chad couldn't say the same, but he knew that he sucked. He totally wanted to fix that. He was a tri-season athlete for God's sake. He could have this self-defense thing down with a little practice. He also knew that he was not going to be given that practice with Taylor, at least tonight.

Chad looked to Ryan hopefully. Maybe Ryan could help him out. Ryan was awesome when he went up against Bob.

"Whatever it is you're thinking, Chad," Taylor interjected. "No."

Chad frowned. He couldn't tell if Taylor was reading his body language correctly or not. Because he didn't see why she would object to Ryan teaching him things. She would object to Chad tagging along with them that night.

"Okay," Chad agreed, still not sure what he had agreed to.

Taylor escorted Chad and Ryan to Ryan's car, giving them explicit directions to go home with Ryan dropping Chad off along the way.

The two boys sat in silence for a mile or so. Which was as long as it took for Chad to become antsy.

"I know that we really shouldn't, but I'm worried about Taylor," Chad admitted, not sure if Ryan would be receptive to Chad's whining.

"Bob and Frank know what they're doing," Ryan responded calmly, not taking his eyes off the road. "They're in the cemetery tonight, so they don't have to worry as much about other people as they would at Zinc."

"How do you know they're going to a cemetery?" Chad demanded.

Ryan gave a one-shouldered shrug. "I overheard Frank telling Bob."

"Let's go help them out. It'll be like five against one. Totally outnumber the vampire," Chad enthused.

"Without us it would be three against one," Ryan pointed out. "We would probably get in the way, too. Too many dancers on a stage."

"What?" Chad blinked heavily at Ryan's metaphor. "Dude, shut up. You know you totally want to. Plus we could hang out on the sidelines and cheer them on. I'm sure you'd make a great cheerleader."

Ryan scowled. "Insulting me isn't going to make me listen to you! And Taylor said we should go directly home. She knows what she's doing."

"Dude, you know you want to go check out the cemetery. C'mon!" Chad wheedled.

"We don't know what we're doing,' Ryan pointed out.

"And we won't ever unless we see them in action!"

Ryan sighed. It sounded resigned. "Fine, but we stay out of their way. They will never know we were there."

"Done!" Chad agreed.

\- - -

Ryan knew exactly which cemetery Taylor was to patrol in, and he parked two blocks away. The cemetery has a high cement wall around it, so Chad and Ryan were able to walk up to it and peer over the side without having to worry about anyone seeing them.

They couldn't see Taylor, Frank, Bob, or any vampire.

Chad was considering jumping up onto the wall, when Ryan pulled him back down. Except it wasn't Ryan, because Chad could see Ryan next to him. And above him when Chad was pulled down.

He struggled and upon finding that he was stuck, looked up into the face of his captor. Because Chad was captured. And it was a vampire who had captured him, and it sucked. And it sucked even more that the vampire had vampire friends. Chad had thought vampires hunted alone. That was a dumb assumption to make. He should have asked Taylor.

Chad had a lot of stupid ideas. Convincing Ryan to drive to the cemetery had to have been one of his stupidest.

He made a choking sound, which caught Ryan's attention.

"Hey!" Ryan - he didn't shout it, but it was said in a loud commanding voice - A stage voice, Chad realized. That would grab Taylor's attention. Hopefully. "Let him go!"

The vampire sneered at them. Well, Chad thought it sneered. It was really difficult to tell.

The vampire's vampire friends attempted to capture Ryan. Ryan fought beautifully. Except for the fact that it was four against one, which did not help Ryan at all, and therefore didn't help Chad.

Ryan was moments away from being taken down, when Chad heard, "Hey, Fang Face!"

And that was Frank, because really? Who else would it be?

The rest passed in a haze of confusing whose fist was whose and did that foot belong to a vampire or a good guy? It ended with an explosion of dust, so Chad figured that the good guys had won.

Chad stood, shaking vampire dust from his hair and noticed that, while Taylor looked impressive when she was really angry, she had nothing on Bob.

A moment later, Bob was in their faces, looming over Chad and Ryan, growling at them. "Don't you _ever_ fucking follow us again." He said it in a tone that implied that he would remove Chad's balls by shoving a hand down Chad's throat. Chad was not too distracted by Bob's anger and threats of bodily harm to notice that Bob looked hot when he was intense.

Frank pulled Bob back before he could say anymore, and they whispered furiously at each other.

"Leave," Taylor commanded Ryan and Chad darkly. "Leave right now."

Chad stared at Taylor, until Ryan pulled Chad away by his arm and shoved him into the passenger's seat of his car.

\- - -

"That didn't go well," Chad said conversationally as Ryan drove furiously back to town.

Ryan snorted. "We're going back to my house," he said primly. "I'm going to teach you how to dance."

"Dance?" Chad squawked.

"Yes. It will teach you how to move your feet properly, so you can defend yourself properly." Ryan didn't look at Chad, but Chad could feel his gaze nonetheless.

"My feet move just fine on a basketball court," Chad retorted.

"We're not playing a game of basketball with vampires," Ryan said, condescendingly.

Chad rolled his eyes. He knew that. It was a metaphor.

"Could we stop off at my house first? If I'm going to do this, I want to wear some clean clothes," Chad said.

"Sure."

\- - -

"Ugh," Chad said with feeling. Landed on his ass for the countless time that day, and it was sore.

"How do you even fall down dancing?" Ryan wondered.

"Can we take a break?" Chad whined.

Ryan sighed dramatically. "Very well."

They wandered down to the kitchen. Ryan made himself a protein shake, and Chad drank a Gatorade. They sit in comfortable silence until Ryan said that they would continue next weekend.

"Why not tomorrow?" Chad asked.

"Because I have places to be tomorrow," Ryan said, patronizing Chad. "I'm not going to put my life on hold because you can't dance properly."

Chad snorts. "Yeah. Drop me off at home. My parents are probably freaking out because this is the second night in a row I've been out since midnight."

Ryan gave Chad an amused look.

\- - -

When Chad headed down to breakfast on Sunday morning, his parents made a joke about Chad's nocturnal tendencies.

"You haven't become a vampire, have you?" his mother asked as Chad poured himself some orange juice.

Chad barely contained his wince. He cleared his throat and lied through his teeth. "I've become friends with the guy who runs sound at Zinc. He's an awesome guy." Who threatened to castrate Chad if he was ever stupid again. Yeah, that sounded like a great guy to be friends with. Chad didn't mention that he was hot. And so was his boyfriend.

"That's good, Chad," his father said. "But we don't want you up to all hours all the time. Especially on school nights."

"I've only been out on the weekends," Chad protested, because he totally had.

"We know," his mother said. "But we don't want this to become a habit."

"And when the school year ends?" Chad asked, because he had to.

"Then there won't be any school nights to go out on," his father replied smoothly. "But consider finding a job."

"Awesome," Chad said into his glass of orange juice. "I'm going to go do my homework now."

\- - -

Taylor approached him on Monday morning before homeroom began. She didn't look happy. Chad endured an unpleasant wave of déjà vu, except this time he didn't have a disarmament plan.

Instead of something intelligent, Chad said, "My parents won't let me go out on weeknights."

Taylor frowned. "That's unfortunate." Chad couldn't determine what Taylor's serious tone meant. "You're coming with me after school. You're going to apologize to both Bob and Frank. And it wouldn't hurt to apologize to me either."

Chad almost considered pointing out that it could have totally been Ryan's fault, but he knew that Taylor would see right through that.

Chad scuffed his shoe along a line in the linoleum tiles. If he apologized right after Taylor demanded it, it would lack sincerity, but if he didn't apologize, Taylor would become even more upset with him.

"I didn't mean to cause trouble," Chad decided would be the least offensive of apologies, because it was true.

Taylor's expression softened notably. "I know you didn't mean to. You were curious, but I've never seen Bob so angry before."

"I really didn't mean to," Chad reiterated.

"Not only did you make people angry, you could have been _killed_. If we weren't there, Chad. If - I don't want that to happen to you. You know what's out there. You should be more careful. And you should also be more careful with Ryan, too."

"Ryan's better at this than I am," Chad admitted.

"This isn't about who's better at this, because this is _my job_, not yours, not Ryan's. It's Frank's job to help me out, and it's Bob's job to keep Frank out of trouble. Nowhere do you factor into this," Taylor explained patiently.

"I do now," Chad said stubbornly. "And so does Ryan."

That was apparently the wrong thing to say, because Taylor looked like she was moments away from throwing Chad into a wall.

The warning bell rang instead.

"Both you and Ryan are coming with me after school," Taylor warned.

Chad nodded meekly and followed her to homeroom.

\- - -

Taylor knocked on the door to Frank and Bob's duplex. Chad and Ryan were behind her.

Frank opened the door, looked at them, sneered, and closed the door again. Taylor grabbed the door and forced it open with noticeably little effort.

"They're coming in, Frank," Taylor said.

"No. They're not," Frank shot back.

"Yes. They are," Taylor insisted.

"No. They're not," Frank said again.

"Frank!" Bob shouted from inside the house. "Shut the fuck up and let them in."

Frank scrunched up in his face in distaste. "Fine," he muttered. He left the doorway without inviting them in.

Taylor pushed her way in, letting Chad and Ryan follow her. Taylor shoved Chad in front of her.

Bob crossed his arms and stared stonily at Chad. Frank did similarly next to Bob but didn't look nearly as intimidating.

"I didn't mean to cause trouble," Chad mumbled to his shoes. "I'm sorry."

Bob looked to Frank, who looked to Bob, and then said, "Does this mean I'm no longer sleeping on the couch?"

Bob smacked him upside the head.

"They were having marital issues," Taylor whispered in Chad's ear. Chad flushed.

Ryan smirked at him. "And I promise not to let Chad convince me that his stupid ideas aren't stupid."

Bob raised his eyebrows.

Frank stood on his tiptoes to whisper something in Bob's ear. Bob smirked. Frank then nipped at Bob's earlobe, and Bob scowled and shoved Frank away, but Frank giggled.

"All four of you," Bob said sternly. "On the couch."

Frank scrambled to perch on the arm. Taylor sighed and sat next to him, providing a buffer between Frank and Chad and Ryan.

Bob pulled a chair from the kitchen table and sat backwards on it, facing the couch.

"We," Bob said eventually, "did not attempt to teach you self-defense so you could head out on patrol."

"Self-defense is for defense, not offense," Frank continued. "You defend yourself. You don't go looking for a fight."

Chad opened his mouth to say that he wasn't looking for a fight. Bob shot him a look, and Chad thought better of it.

"We don't need to keep you both out of trouble while patrolling," Bob said. "Now, deal with Frank. I'm done here." Bob stood up and went upstairs.

Frank jumped up. "Research time! I kick ass at this part!"

Chad suppressed a groan.

"I got a call from Patrick. He and his boys are in New York doing something-something, so he can't really help us," Frank explained. Who the hell was Patrick? Taylor nodded, so it must have made sense to her. "He did suggest a book that might have what we're looking for. We don't have it, but Brian does. He's gonna fax it later." Who was Brian?

Taylor nodded. "Did Patrick mention anything about Camisado?"

"He said that it was a generic vampire uprising," Frank said with a nod. "Except that they bring their pets."

"Vampires have pets?" Chad asked. "Like dogs?"

"No," Taylor said carefully. "They're a little more demonic than that."

"Demon dogs?" Chad asked.

"No, Fluffy," Frank said with a roll of his eyes. "Demons."

"Like demon-demons," Chad asked. Ryan was silent throughout the entire thing, but Chad could feel the sarcasm radiating from him. "Werewolves? Is there such a thing as werewolves?"

"Yes and no," Taylor said. "Werewolves don't associate with vampires."

"Oh," Chad said faintly.

Bob came down the stairs with his arms loaded with all sorts of things that he dropped onto the kitchen table.

"It's time for a crash course in vampires, seeing as how you're too stupid to stay away," Bob announced.

Frank gave Bob a look that Taylor shared. It was the kind of look that locals gave when discussing tourists.

"I'll take this," Frank said unhappily. He stepped up to the table and picked up a stake. "Anything wooden through the heart will kill a vampire." He tossed the stake at Chad and then another one at Ryan. Ryan caught his, Chad barely did, but in his defense, Frank threw it at him point-first. "Beheading and fire will also do the trick. Sunlight causes a vamp-fire, too."

"You hopefully won't need these," Taylor added tightly.

Frank nodded. "Next is holy water. It's fucking battery acid to vamps." He tossed a small vial at Chad and one at Ryan. "Aim for the eyes. It'll burn the shit out of them."

Chad inspected his vial. It looked like plain tap water to him.

"Next is the cross. It's vamp repellant. Have one on you at all times." Frank pointed to a silver cross hanging from Taylor's neck. He handed Chad and Ryan a palm-sized wooden cross. "Any Christian paraphernalia works if you don't have cross ready." Frank pointed to his left forearm. One of his tattoos was… Chad didn't know. It just looked like a chick wrapped in blue with a whole bunch of swords. She was standing on a whole bunch of skulls.

"Our Lady of Sorrows," Taylor said, watching Chad's expression closely.

Frank looked at her and nodded before continuing, "You turn into a vampire when another vamp sucks all the blood from you, and then you drink your blood back from the vamp."

"That sounds really unsanitary," Ryan sneered.

Frank gave him a lopsided grin before continuing, "And vamps can't enter your house unless you invite them in, so don't invite a fucking vamp into your home. Any questions?"

Chad shook his head.

Ryan looked thoughtful. "What if a person was invited into my house and then turned?"

Frank lit up. "I like you, Pretty Boy. No, the vamp isn't that person anymore; it's a demon wearing that person's skin. You'd need to invite the vampire in."

Ryan winced slightly.

"How did you end up a Watcher?" Chad asked. It had nothing to do with Vampire 101, but he was really curious.

Frank waggled a finger in his face. "Not until you prove yourself, Fluffy," he clucked. Chad caught Frank shooting Bob a strange look. It wasn't a warning, and it wasn't a concern, but it was serious, and Chad was confused.

"I need to go," Ryan announced. "Shar's waiting for me."

"I should go, too," Chad agreed, shoving the cross and holy water into his pants pockets and fiddling with the stake, unsure where to conceal it. "Thanks for Vampire 101, guys."

"Stay the fuck away from vampires," Frank shouted as they left.

\- - -

On Wednesday, Ryan found Chad in the locker room after school, changing for baseball try-outs. He leaned against a locker as Chad had a shirt over his head, startling him.

"Are you here for try-outs?" Chad asked once he recovered.

"No," Ryan said, puckering his lips.

"Okay." Chad had no idea what else to say.

"Friday night. Would you like to go with me to Zinc?" Ryan asked slowly.

"Uh," Chad said intelligently. He had no idea where Ryan could possibly go with that. "Why?"

"It would be helpful to learn to dance with other people present. More realistic," Ryan explained. Chad caught on right away.

"Yeah. We should do that. Thanks, man." Chad gave Ryan a sloppy smile as Sharpay stormed into the locker room.

"Sharpay!" Ryan hissed. "You can't be in here."

"It's nothing I haven't seen before," Sharpay brushed off. And eww, that was something Chad never wanted to think about.

"And what does the Ice Princess want?" Chad scoffed

"Be gone, tall person, this is about Ryan." Sharpay waved a hand in front of Chad's face.

Chad rolled his eyes, grabbed his glove, and headed to the gym. On the way out, Chad heard Sharpay say something that included Chad's name, Zinc, and something that may have been "halls" or "walls" or something along those lines.

\- - -

Chad ran into Taylor after try-outs. He was waiting out in front of the school for his mother to pick him up. Taylor had stumbled out of the school looking roughed up.

"Hey, Taylor, are you okay? You don't look so hot," Chad offered.

Taylor approached him, her mouth set in a tight line.

"Frank's picking me up," was all she offered in return.

"You also smell like you fell in a toilet." Chad wrinkled his nose at her.

"Sewer systems," Taylor said. "Uh. I'll probably have to burn these clothes."

"Will Frank let you in his car smelling like that?" Chad asked.

"He'd damn well better," Taylor huffed.

"Hey," Chad said inanely, then cleared his throat. "Just a heads up: Ryan and I are heading out to Zinc on Friday night."

"That's nice," Taylor said distractedly. She examined the sleeve of her long-sleeved t-shirt. "Frank better still have some club soda left, otherwise this is never going to come out."

Frank arrived before Chad's mother, ushering Taylor into his tiny car with a "See you, Fluffy" thrown at Chad.

Troy lumbered out of the school at that moment. "Fluffy?" He started giggling.

"Shut up, dude," Chad snapped. "Where have you been the past few days?"

Troy blinked at him. "I've been - "

"My life is falling apart!" Chad interrupted.

Troy stared at him a beat. "Isn't that overdramatic, Fluffy?"

"No! And don't call me that, loser!" Chad grumbled.

"How's your life falling apart?" Troy asked, setting down his school bag.

"It's just that - " Chad cut himself off. Troy was looking back at the school. Gabriella had exited the building and had his friend's full attention. Chad snorted. That totally figured. "Never mind."

Chad's mother showed up moments later. If she had been even a moment later, Chad thought he would have thrown up from the amount of sugar spewing from his friend.

\- - -

Ryan picked Chad up Friday night, much to Chad's embarrassment. But no one from East was at Zinc to witness Chad dancing with Ryan. Chad finally had a handle on not stepping on anyone's foot, and it wasn't as horrible as Chad thought it would be. And Chad totally wasn't thinking about how shiny Ryan was when covered in a fine sheen of sweat.

Chad felt eyes on him, became self-conscious, and fell into Ryan. Ryan caught him with a smirk.

The eyes belonged to Bob, who scowled at Chad and Ryan from his soundboard. Bob then took out his phone and texted something.

Moments later, Frank was by their sides. "Fluffy, Pretty Boy, you two need to leave."

Chad frowned at Frank.

"Don't ask questions, Fluffy," Frank said urgently, pushing Chad in the direction of the door.

Taylor ran over to them, winding her way through the dancers. "They're already inside," she reported.

"Fuck," Frank replied succinctly.

"Chad, Ryan. Please leave," Taylor pleaded. "I'm going to go pull the fire alarm. Frank, see if you can contact Bob. Get him off the stage. Discretely. Don't stick your hand down his pants like you did before."

Taylor and Frank disappeared into the crowd. Chad and Ryan looked at each other.

"We should go," Ryan said.

"Should," Chad reminded him.

The music stopped. There were a lot of groans of disappointment from the crowd.

"May I have your attention!" Someone shouted from the stage. It wasn't Frank, and it wasn't Bob.

Chad looked to the stage to see a vampire with its demonic face on. Well, that was a good way to ruin his evening out with Ryan. Which the point of which was to help Chad with his self-defense to deal with vampires, but Chad had been enjoying himself.

The fire alarm went off, splashing white and red light around the club complete with blaring siren.

The vampire glowered out at the club. At least Chad thought it glowered; it was hard to tell. He would have glowered had he been the one on stage when a fire alarm went off.

"Do you have anything on you?" Chad asked Ryan over the din of the siren. Chad had a cross in his pocket and that was it.

"A stake and some holy water," Ryan responded.

"Awesome. I have a cross." Chad pursed his lips.

"Can you stay out of trouble?" Ryan's voice sounded both concerned and exasperated.

Chad bit his lip. "I can try, but you can totally kick undead ass to save me."

Ryan gave Chad a wry smile that probably meant something Chad should understand.

The crowd thinned out, streaming out of the exits, but the vampires - there were a lot of vampires - were blocking a good-sized chunk of the crowd from leaving. Maybe like twenty kids, but that was still enough to cause trouble.

The vampire on stage was not happy with this development. He shouted out some command, and one of his vampire buddies brought a struggling girl to him on stage. He brushed the hair away from her neck while she whimpered and sobbed.

Chad could see Frank poised backstage next to Bob. Both men looked ready to pounce and kick vampiric ass.

"Let her go!" Chad heard Taylor shout.

The vampire on stage sighed and gave Taylor a condescending look.

"This is between you and me," Taylor declared. "This has nothing to do with her. Let her go."

Chad and Ryan watched the exchange with interest, so neither saw the vampire sneak up behind them. It held them with superhuman strength, and no matter how much Chad struggled, it wouldn't budge.

Ryan tried to communicate something to Chad through eyebrow waggles. Chad had no idea what he was trying to say.

The next thing Chad realized was that Ryan was left-handed and holy water really _was_ like battery acid to vampires.

The vampire holding Ryan released him and clutched at its burning eyes. Ryan wasted no time delivering a sweeping kick and a stake to the vampire's heart. And that was so totally awesome! That was a lot more intense than what Chad had seen the weekend before. Ryan had been practicing, and he was definitely showing Chad up, but he was in the process of saving Chad's ass, so Chad was okay with that.

Ryan also took out the vampire that was holding Chad, and for the second time that night Chad fell into Ryan's arms. Which kinda made Chad feel like the heroine in one of his mother's made-for-tv movies that she watched on Oxygen.

Ryan gave Chad a kiss on the cheek. That was not what Chad had expected, especially because Ryan was covered in vampire dust. Vampire dust was not at all sexy. - That's what Chad was worried about? That Ryan kissing him wasn't as sexy as he had expected?

Chad didn't even know he'd expected it. But Ryan was hot when taking down vampires. And other times. Chad would totally make an exception for Ryan's boy parts.

"Don't die," Ryan ordered.

Chad smirked at Ryan and dragged him behind the bar, snagging a lighter from the shelf behind them.

Taylor and the main vampire were duking it out on stage. Frank and Bob were out in the pit taking on vampires. The twenty-odd club kids had, at some point, escaped.

And about six vampires advanced on the bar.

"You can be the brawn. I'll be the brains." Chad smirked at Ryan again and grabbed a bottle of vodka from the shelf behind the bar and a rag hanging from the side. He unscrewed the bottle, poured some vodka on the rag, then shoved it into the bottle. He did this twice more.

Chad waggled one bottle in Ryan's direction before taking the lighter to it. "Molotov cocktail."

Chad peered over the top of the bar and threw the bottle at the group of vampires.

They burned like paper.

"Awesome!" Chad crowed.

Taylor jumped clear over the bar and landed in front of them. It was so cool!

"That was quick thinking, Chad," she said fondly. "Except you didn't leave when I asked you to." She glared at both boys.

Chad attempted to look innocent. He was not successful.

Taylor rolled her eyes. "Are you two okay?"

Chad nodded and Ryan did the same.

Taylor looked back over her shoulder to Frank and Bob. Frank leaned heavily on Bob with a hand clasped over his left eye.

"Is Frank okay?" Ryan asked.

"He'll be fine. Bob takes good care of him." Taylor nodded. Right. Taylor's Watcher had a watcher.

"Was that Camisado?" Chad asked.

Taylor nodded. "I still have a few more things to take care of, but, yeah, that was Camisado."

"I thought there would be more demons," Chad mused.

Taylor snorted. "There were enough."

"What are you going to take - "

Taylor interrupted Chad, "I'm doing it by myself. You two should go home. The fire company is going to show up soon."

Chad realized that the sirens from the alarm were still blasting away. And his cocktail was still burning on the floor.

Ryan tugged at Chad's hand. "I'll drop you off at home."

Chad nodded. "Take good care of yourself, Tay. I expect to see you bright and early Monday morning before homeroom."

Taylor narrowed her eyes suspiciously at Chad's voluntary exit.

Ryan directed Chad outside with a hand cupping Chad's elbow.

\- - -

Chad and Ryan sat in the front seat of Ryan's convertible in the parking lot behind Zinc.

"So," Chad stated inanely.

"So," Ryan parroted.

"Was that a "we're all going to die" kiss or did you mean something by it?" Chad blurted out. "'Cause it would be cool either way."

Even by the pathetic light cast by the street lamps, Chad knew Ryan was blushing. "Uh… both?"

"How'd you know I wouldn't freak out on you?" Chad pressed.

"Because you think Frank and Bob are hot," Ryan explained logically.

"We are!"

Chad jerked his attention up to see Bob roll his eyes as he navigated Frank into the front seat of Frank's car. Which was parked ten feet away from Ryan's car.

Both Chad and Ryan blushed.

"You two get your groove on!" Frank shouted, then giggled at himself.

"Don't mind him," Bob grunted, succeeding in settling Frank into the car. "He has a concussion."

Chad nodded vaguely. "You're hot when taking down vampires," Chad muttered, blushing more.

Ryan smirked at him. "I am." He kissed the tip of Chad's nose. Chad twitched, and Ryan's lips connected with Chad's, and that was that. They did pull apart when Frank wolf-whistled at them.

"Come back to my place," Ryan murmured into Chad's mouth.

Chad nodded. "I totally want your boy parts."

Ryan snorted in surprise before succumbing to bawling laughter.

"Be happy you're cute, Fluffy," he said dryly once he'd recovered.

"Oh! Bring it, Pretty Boy!" Chad challenged.

\- - -

Chad woke up to shrill yelling. It was, like, right in his ear. Not cool. Arms tightened around Chad's waist. Those were Ryan's arms, Chad noted with a large dollop of smugness. They had awesome and talented fingers attached to them.

Chad smirked and buried his face into Ryan's shoulder.

"Ryan!" was yelled shrilly again. "What is the meaning of this?"

"We had excess energy to burn off," Ryan said calmly. Chad could feel the rumble of Ryan's voice in his chest.

"You said you would never stoop so far as to hook up with a closeted jock! You promised me!" Chad didn't want to look up to see where Sharpay stood, but it felt like she was screaming in his ear.

"'M not closeted," Chad muttered. "I like boy parts."

"Eww!" Sharpay squealed. "Don't be a cretin. Ugh! We _will_ talk of this later, Ryan!" she threatened. "Just be glad our parents are in Milan!" She huffed. She must have left, because the room was eerily silent.

"Didn't mean to get you in trouble with your sister," Chad apologized, burying himself further in Ryan's shoulder.

"It's fine. Let's go grab some breakfast and not tell her about vampires," Ryan suggested

"Do you have waffles?" Chad asked hopefully.

"I'm sure we could find something." Chad could hear the smile in Ryan's voice.

Chad smiled into Ryan's shoulder.

\- - -

"Hey, Chad!" Troy called out on their way to homeroom. "Did you hear about what happened at Zinc? You were there Friday night, right?"

"Yeah," Chad said. "Ryan and I left before anything happened, though."

"You and Ryan?" Troy squinted at Chad.

Chad shrugged, adjusting his backpack. "Yeah. Me and Ryan."

"Cool," Troy said. That was not what Chad expected Troy to say, but it was good enough. "Everybody should have a chance to love somebody."

That last part was not for Chad's benefit, but for Gabriella's, who had shown up out of the blue to make moony eyes at Troy.

Chad shook his head. Whatever.

Taylor found Chad next. He was just about to enter Mrs. Darbus's room when she pulled him away by his arm. Ryan was with her.

"Can you guys come over next weekend?" Taylor asked, looking from Ryan to Chad.

"Sure," they both said.

"Good." Taylor dipped her head in approval. "Frank said that you've proven yourselves."

"Awesome!" Chad grinned at Ryan. "We're gonna fight vampires!"

Taylor raised her eyebrows at him. "The next big thing is a coven of witches - the evil ones, not the good ones. They've set up a place downtown. Are you guys ready for a night of research?"

"Are we going to be more involved this time?" Ryan asked warily.

Taylor smiled fully. "You've proven yourselves to Frank. You guys are in." She gave them a thumbs up.

Chad wrapped an arm around Ryan's shoulder. "We'll be there. We can even bring some pizza."

"Bring Chinese and you'll be golden," Taylor beamed.

\- - -

Not the End


End file.
